Teenage Boy "Curiosity" ?!

[LadyHawke]

My son is 14, will be 15 in June. For about a year now, I would find magazine pictures of women, etc in his room, and I left them be.
Then it started on internet pictures, more...explicit of teenage girls and older women...
Plus we discovered he was having some VERY adult conversations on yahoo messenger (he was sneaking down at 2 and 3 in the morning)...sometimes pretending to be a girl even and getting very sexually detailed in these conversations with people (I have NO idea where he learned this stuff, and I think he knows more than WE do!)...so we blocked the internet and password protected the computer....and he is NOT allowed on the internet at all unless one of us is sitting there with him...

Lately, he has been using my bubble baths and scented washes, when he has his own "male scented" body washes...
I keep finding tampons that have been opened up in the bathroom trash...
I found some of my lingerie stuffed into a dresser drawer when I was putting his t-shirts away and refolding what was in the drawers to get them to fit neatly...
today I found two of my pink disposable razors and a handful of makeup sponges in his bathrobe pocket (it was down to wash)...

I am concerned about this "odd behavior"...or is it just "normal curiosity" and I should ignore it?!?!...

Whenever we try to talk to him about anything, like playing around with the tampons just because "they are fun to watch in water" (his explanation)...he usually gets very defensive and refuses to even admit to anything, even though the evidence is right there...

We try to be calm when talking with him, and just want to understand, or help him understand...

Any ideas?!

[Mike Bradley]

Dear Mom,
The curiosity is normal, but the number of incidents and the late timing is not (usually boys do some of this stuff at earlier ages).
I'd play this conservatively and get him to chat with a helper to see if there are other issues going on. The 'Net stuff can get so crazy so fast these days that we must be cautious.
Make a deal. Tell him that you'll stop bugging him about this stuff if he'll chat with a helper who must hold his words confidentially. Let him pick whether he'd prefer a male or female, and perhaps throw in a bribe if he resists.