Worried Mom

[mama]

I am a mother of two. A daughter and a son. My son will be fifteen next month. He is an intelligent and ofen times nice and loveable boy. Some times gets angry, uses swears. My concern is that he does not have any social life. At school he works well with others. After coming home, goes on the computer and the Internet. I am afraid that he might be talking to others on the Internet. He does not get out of the house or plays any aports. During the entire summer he stayed inside. He does go to a martial arts class which he likes very much. I am very much worried about his social life. When ever I talk to him about this, he doesn't take it seriously. Please advise me in this matter.

[Mike Bradley]

Dear Mom,
I think you're right to be worried. An entire summer inside is too much. The fact that your son laughs at your concerns does not mean you should stop calmly letting him know that you are worried. Many kids do use the 'Net as a substitute for a social life, but it's a bad bargain.
Try fostering some activities perhaps by sponsoring trips for him and a few friends from his martial arts class. Consider amusement parks, the beach/mountains, or perhaps a pizza sleepover. A job is another option to get him out more. Negotiate this with him, saying it is time that he began earning his own money to help pay his way.
Keep at this, calmly and lovingly, and keep your eyes open to be sure something else is not going on, like depression or anxiety that might be keeping him away fom activities. The things kids learn by socializing in the teen years are too critical to miss out on.
Keep us posted.
Mike Bradley