Hello Dr. Mike
Well I was hopeing by now to be able to tell you my son is better but sadly I cannot. In January he tried to end his life, but thankfully his guardian angel cousin seen his good bye letter on his MySpace page, eventhough she was breaking a rule of being on past 10 pm--whe woke my sister and they called us.
Life has changed a lot since my original post "Anxiety" we had to move to a new state--this was good and bad. The good is better school support than before and definately better doctors. The bad is my son has no connections other than us. All our attempts to get him in school has failed. We even got him into a specialty school--something we have tried to find since 05 but he just cannot get there. Each morning he has all the same symptoms--head, stomach, neck and back pain. Any time we bring up school the hair on his arms raises. The doctors here say that so much damage has been done to him in our past school district that he is extremely fragile. He has a very lenghty list for the diagnosis and his case is very complicated.
He wants to be like other kids and finish school. Here you can only get homebound for 1 semister and he did pass all his classes except PE. He needs the social interaction but I havn't found that for him as he dosent' attend school, he will not try any sports as he hates to sweat so life is challenging. My son is so lonely even with us around, we have tried all kinds of medications but we always have disasterous results as his body reacts in a negative way. Another good place we have found is a treatment center which is giving us hope as they try to aid the medications with vitamin and minerals specially formualted to the individual--not a one size fits all. The testing was costly but they are running 150 different tests. We pray that this will show us some answers like he has too much copper or not enough something else. We should get the results mid April.
We are not going to give up on him as he is important. I have to say I am tired of going to doctors appointments, theropy sessions, IEP meetings and not have any major results happen. I know how much money I have spent and I have no idea how much more my insurance has paid but each day that goes by he is getting closer to 18--then all the extra support stops unless we can get him to continue school and hopefully graduate so he can get a job and support himself. We are looking into taking other steps for SSI but most of the people that have HFA don't qualify but maybe with his other disabilities he may? I just don't know when to start this as it looks like we are putting up the white flag and giving up on him. So we are in the rock and a hard place--but we will never give up on him as he is a very wonderful young man that is just struggling.
You are in the last few miles of your marathon, and you sound understandably exhausted. But the fact is that your finish line might finally be in sight.
First, know that Disability benefits are not a "white flag" but are a source of assistance to which he is entitled to help him to continue to heal until he is able to become self-sufficient. Be ready to fight for these things, and get an attorney if you must if your case is initially rejected.
Second, the fact that you've finally found good support systems for your son (schools & helpers) is wonderful! But it will take them some time to sort out exactly what is going on with your son (and how to fix it) so your job for now is to get yourself more hopeful, and then inspire your son by pointing out these facts to him. Keep assuring him that you guys will work through this together as a family, that nothing can beat you if you hang tough together.
Keep your eyes focused on that finish line.
Dr. Mike Bradley